Welcome to United States of Joe!

Me, staring at a computer screen. Or pretty much me, when I’m not eating or sleeping.


Hi! My name is Joe, and I work in a button factory! Actually, I work in the Accounts Payable department of an HVAC distributor, but that’s neither here nor there. If I were to write about what I do on weekdays between the hours of 8 AM and 5 PM, this site would be dreadfully boring. As it stands, it still yet may be boring, but at least I won’t be writing about data entry or reconciling vendor invoices with our company’s receiving records. Yeah, that’s what I thought.

So, what is this blog all about? Who the heck is the author anyway? And how many psychiatrists does take it to switch a light bulb? The answers to these questions and more await you!

1. “So, Joe, who is you?”

Who is I, you ask? Good question. I’m still trying to figure that much out, but right now, I’m a thirty-something out of New Jersey. I graduated from Rutgers University with a B.A. in Psychology, but I’m going in a, shall we say, more practical direction with an MBA with a concentration in Accounting from William Paterson University. Regarding work, you know about the whole A/P thing. In my pipiest of pipe dreams, I would be a professional singer-songwriter. Sure, go on, I hear you snickering over there. In my less-ideal future, I ‘d be a paid blogger/writer. As it stands, I’m on an accounting/finance career path. You know, because I would like to be able to actually buy things eventually.

Otherwise, I enjoy music, sports, and various forms of food and drink. Also, ladies, I am a Leo. (Air and Fire signs, what up?) I would say I enjoy long walks on the beach, but that’s only if my pasty white skin doesn’t burn, and even then, I probably would be wondering when we’d be getting salt-water taffy.

2. “What exactly am I reading?”

This is United States of Joe, and nothing is out of bounds! Nothing, I say! Actually, I probably won’t be writing about the Kardashians anytime soon. Or if I can help it, Justin Bieber. I’m intending on USoJ to confront various economic, political and social issues. In the midst of an election cycle such as the current one, a lot of fun topics (and by “fun,” I mean, yelled-about and often deeply depressing) have been brought to the national consciousness, and I’d like to be one of the voices that keeps the discussion going, however chaotic and unsure it may be.

3. “I wouldn’t be detecting any biases in what I read here, would I?”

Only a huge liberal bias. Sorry in advance. I’ve thought in the past I might be more moderate, but the discussions raised as part of the Democratic primary, and other ongoing world events, such as conservatives’ apparent objection to the transgender community taking a leak, just make me want to hug some trees and fire up some rants. The analyses herein are going to be in-depth pieces. Sorry in advance again. I just don’t think succinct writing is in my DNA. So you may desire to prepare a beverage or snack before you begin each post. I mean, you should enjoy all the reading you’ll be doing.

4. “Don’t I recognize you from somewhere?”

No, but you may be confusing me with my brother. He already has a much more successful blog called Dressed to Ill that he operates, and an Instagram to boot. If you read it, you’ll see pictures of him looking like a hipster Jesus. And various photos of cups of coffee. And he has this thing with floors. Regardless, you should get some solid tips on men’s fashion from him. Not from me. If I can’t wear jeans or something of a slightly stretchy nature, I’m already out of my element.

5. “OK, so how many psychiatrists does it take to switch a light bulb?”

Only one, but the light bulb has to want to change. Come on, you could’ve Googled that, couldn’t you?


Anyhoo, that’s my story. Thanks for stopping by, and simultaneously, you’re welcome.

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